Something about me and my family!!!

Well I was a single parent of ten (10) children. Yes you got it I had ten children. I had 6 girls and 4 boys they were a joy to have. I had went to school and finish high school with in all having children. I soon went back and started collage with still having children. I want to make something out of myself for my children. I soon moved from an all black town to a high rich place where I wanted my children to have much more children in a big family. Well as a surprise the summer of 2000 DCFS/CPS came into my life. I will tell you about my forever hurt and pain that I and my kids are left with. I was the day of my oldest graduation when DCFS/CPS came to get my kids. My oldest son had gotten his butt spanked the night before because of his behavior in school. My kids are very far skinned and can easily see a red mark or small hand print on him. That morning he went to school and told the teacher that his leg was hurting and he had gotten a spanking from me. The teacher felt like it was her right to call DCFS/CPS with out even talking to me about what happen or anything. After she calls someone the police and the DCFS/CPS department they came to my house and told me to come to the police station. I was asking why I had to get my self and the other kids ready for my oldest graduation, they just said to come down there it was about my oldest son. OK I went down there they keep me from see my son to see what was going on. Then they keep me there for hours on end talking. After that it was a field lady told me in my face that she was going to take my kids from me and I would have to jump threw hoops to get them back. Well one thing she did not lie about that!!!! Now they told me that I could got I went home and got my kids together at that time, also when this was happening they went to get my oldest off the stage from the high school. They came to my home with about 15 police and 2 DCFS/CPS works trying to take kids as I fought to keep them in my arms. They came and took kids from me crying and kicking saying “please don’t take me Mommy please don’t let them take me”, yes I was in so much of shock that all I could do is cry. Well I went to every class, visit and all that. I was crying just as much as my kids were at the end of the visits. As court after court there was soooo many of them to go to and there was not saying anything but 6 months, 10 months and so on for a return home gold. I had to give up my home and relocation of my job because I could not handle a big house with 8 bed room and 4 bathrooms in it. Now at the time I start to lost the fight with them they told me that I must go to ongoing consoling to see if I could get my kids back that already had been 3 years. In them three years I had very little help threw the people how handle my kids case. I herd of things they was suppose to help me with be they did nothing but every once a wail give me a couple of  bus cards hat did not get me where I need to go. They said to me that I would have to do ongoing doctor physic help to see if I get my kids back that was it for me. At that time I had to give up my house and had to move to another place that was so small and try to keep a job, even trying to get to all the meeting they would spring up and have. I was working at night but with meeting about 3 hours away on the bus and need to get some sleep it did not work out for me. Well after that I need a change to survive the killing of me as a person that the state of Illinois put on me so I move to anther state. Now that I have more they have took all right always from some of my kids and some kids was asked and they said no. I now go to see the children once a year. They foster families are acting like they had these kids keep them from talking to me and seeing me. I have just a few will agree on letting me speak to them and see them. Some children I have not see or talked to in about 2 1/2 years that’s just cold. My kids want to keep in touch with me, and there are some I need to explain what happen and can’t. As a parent I ask myself and the state what I did so bad to deserve the forever hurt me and my kids go threw. Even please that do things get a chance in life me and my kids don’t. All of my children are going up now; I feel it every time I look at everyone and there kids. I have one child that is now 21 years old wow she is all grown up and out of the system. But I still have 9 others that is in the system and needs there parent to love them like I love them. I know have a new baby to the family that is a granddaughter that is growing up in the system with her mom. The cycle has to stop some where and it will with my family. I don’t want this to happen to other families around the United States but guess what it is if we as people don’t do something about it!!!!!!!!