Jumping Through Hoops
April 11, 2016 in child abuse, Child Protective Services, CPS
Please pray for this family. This is so unfair.
I am currently in the midst of a life destroying case with the Hamilton CPS. The man who is overseeing this is named Tom Irvine. This man is not looking out for what’s best for my children or myself, I am being treated like a criminal and drug addict even though I have zero history with the law on both accounts. I would like to tell you my story and request please that this man’s job and professionalism be looked into. Or at least my case be handled by someone with a heart and better logical outlook.
In November, my boyfriend of 4 years picked my children up from daycare and took them to his house. This is not unusual because Gabe (my boyfriend) cares for my children 40% of the time my children all call him daddy. An incident happened and Gabe had to punish my youngest son. I’m not condoning what he did and if I was there things would have went differently but I was not there. We do not live together nor do we even live in the same town. Gabe struck my child on his face and left a nasty bruise. My youngest was questioned at school and he said that his daddy did it and Gabe got arrested.
Then CPS decided that that was not enough apparently and refused to allow me to then go home with my own children they were accusing me of knowing of the abuse and turning a blind eye when I had done nothing but cooperate with them the entire day. I had to either have my children stay at my mom’s or have someone sign a protection order and volunteer to be with me every second I was with my children for the next 30 days or my children had to go to foster care.
I was irate, how dare they treat me like I had struck my child myself and/or watched as Gabe did it. Like I said I wasn’t even in the same town when it happened. I reluctantly agreed and found a friend with no life but to supervise me with my own flesh and blood. The 30 day protection order was done December 24th. My friend who signed up for this his name is James and is the only other person in the meeting with the CPS besides myself.
CPS never once said anything to me or him about this continuing beyond the 30 days. I never received any emails or calls or paperwork on anything else, nobody contacted me beyond December. Both of us believed that I had fulfilled my half and it was over on my end. (Why would we think otherwise.)
In January, CPS gave Gabe back his visitation rights with his own biological child as long as he had a friend sign on, to be there to supervise, why would they do this if they thought Gabe such a threat? This also says out loud to the rest of us that the case is slowly starting to be over on his end as well.
In February, I became wicked sick and was unable to care for myself let alone my children. I did not know at the time but I had beginning stages of pneumonia, I have asthma on top of that and could not breath well enough to even make it down my hallway. Gabe has been my only support forever he is not a bad person just doesn’t know what to do with his anger sometimes. He called the cps office many times trying to get them to hook him up with parenting classes, anger management, something so that he could get his family back and nobody would help him.
He looked this stuff up online himself, he called the anger management and enrolled himself and was there every Monday evening doing homework, (Gabe does not do homework). He begged me to give him another chance to let him show me that he can change. I have known Gabe for a long time and I have never seen him like this a shell of the cocky tall standing man that I once knew.
We had a family and life together, bills and assets intertwined and I agreed to let him help me. So in February, when I became so sick Gabe came over to help me just like he would have at any other times. He made supper washed and tucked the kids in bed said prayers and everything was perfect. The next morning he got up early and packed the kids cold lunch and dropped them off at school.
My youngest then proud said to his teacher look my daddy made me cold lunch. The police then came and arrested Gabe and the next day cps came and removed my children. Now if that’s not crazy enough on that day was the first day this Tom Irvine had ever met me before in his life, he comes into my home with another lady planning on giving me a drug test right then and there as they are removing my children.
I was volatile and uncooperative, but what do you expect when you are stripping away my reason for living. The drug test was not done, I would have refused anyway based on the fact that I have zero drug history with the law and this is an abuse case not a drug case. The next day or so he tells me that if I come in and sign papers and agree to treatment that this would all be over faster. “Treatment for what?” I ask him. He doesn’t answer.
I’m not voluntarily going in and saying yes I’m on drugs just because you say it will look good on my behalf like I’m cooperating or something. How does that make sense? That can only screw me further. I will take a pee test and it will be clean there is no reason for treatment. I have never been arrested nor in jail for anything ever and do not appreciate being treated like a criminal from the get go.
They branded me as being non cooperative and forced my children into saying things that they wanted to hear and then they used my own children against me and nothing in my life has been more heartbreaking than that. If you dig enough into any body’s lives your going to find indiscretions they dug up and said terrible things about me. Letters were send to my kids elementary school to daycare and to my son’s physical therapy. I can’t pick them up, I can’t drop them off, I can’t even be seen alone with them.
Any amount of reputation I have created since moving to Montana was destroyed in an instant. Why am I being treated like I abused my children myself. The elementary school told me that if I call them again it’ll be considered harassment. Just two weeks previous to that I was in that school sitting around the table with the principal that counselor another counselor and my daughters teacher, I was a great mom then my daughter was taking leaps and bounds above where she started out everything was going fine and we were all patting ourselves on the back for a job well done and now they are having my kids write their valentine’s cards to grandma like mommy no longer exists. I can’t even breathe this is so unreal.
My lawyer then became super sick and had to have emergency surgery is was unaware of this all in knew is that I could not get a hold of her. Tom knew this, he told my lawyer that he would tell me of our upcoming court date. He then took liberties with my children and myself that I do not think would have happened if my lawyer had not been in the hospital.
He called me in for a meeting and I sat with him for a half hour hashing our case out and he never once said anything about my lawyer being in the hospital nor did he tell me of my upcoming court date. He did ask me please, “He said do not contest this in court because it will only make it worse.” You don’t want me to fight for my children I ask?
That makes no sense mostly because I have never done anything wrong in my life and I feel like this is a great injustice. And my children are my only life without them in have nothing of course I’m going to fight for my reason to breathe. He explains to me how he is 100% sure that they are going to win and that I should just cooperate.
I explain to him once again that it’s not just taking temporary custody from me it’s taking everything from me. If I loose temporary custody I loose my son’s social security, I loose child support, therefore and I’m not exaggerating I loose my home, I loose my car I literally loose everything that I have. Is it your policy to render people homeless? I beg for an alterative the crime does not fit the punishment. Tom will not listen he is so focused on winning this case that it is overlapping what should be common human decency. And by not telling me of my upcoming court date I would have missed my court appearance and CPS would have won by default. That is simply unprofessional.
Since my lawyer is recovering from surgery she requested that we push forward our court date once again. Now my court date is going to be after Easter weekend and I’m devastated. I asked my mom to ask this Tom guy, (because he won’t work with me on anything) if I can have my children for Easter weekend I wish to take them to the Easter egg hunt. I have been begging to let the same person that signed on for the 30 to sign on again to be my supervision for whatever amount of time they decree and he won’t even discuss it.
We ask if this person (James) can sign on for Easter weekend at least and now Tom said no, because they believe that James knew that I was sneaking Gabe in and did not report it — an outright lie. Tom knows that James is my only person who can do this for me and he also knows that James is my only witness that I have that is going to stand up in court saying that CPS never once informed me that they would take away custody if I let Gabe in my house past that 30 day protection order. But most of all Gabe and James are competing for the same woman and have never been in the same place at the same time.
Now that they have eliminated James from the equations I have nobody and they know it. Also it’s Easter weekend do I not have any basic emotional rights. If I myself was not the person to strike my child then why can I not be alone with them they are my children my blood my family and nothing in this world is more important to me. I just want this to be over I just want to celebrate Easter.
My youngest birthday is in two weeks and I’m crying right now just thinking about what kind of crap they are going to pull for that as well. I am not a criminal the only thing I am guilty of is being under informed and I feel like the Hamilton CPS office should then be guilty as well for not doing their job correctly. Please I do not deserve to loose everything I have over something that I did not do. My children just want to come home.
Monique B.
Ravalli County, Montana
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