Second Surprise Visit

So, I have been gone all weekend in Los Angeles visiting my best friend before I have this baby. Im 23 weeks pregnant so I had a little time to travel.

I got home Sunday night, late, and Monday morning my husband had to leave for Dallas on a business trip. I have been battling a virus all week as it is, and I was bedraggled.

In the afternoon I DID have that tugging feeling inside, but I have that tugging feeling quite often anyway given the situation. It was hot out- 80 degrees here, and the kids were playing in the backyard with the hose. CPS decided to come at 5:00pm and do a walk through. When I opened the door (I dont have a peephole unfortunately) all the blood in my body dropped to my feet because I felt unprepared.

I live in a living, breathing home of 7 people actively utilizing the house at random throughout the day. We dont live in a hotel and I cant follow the kids around all day making sure they turn off every light and pick up every toy the minute they take them out. At the end of the day, when the kids get ready for bed- we play clean up and pick things up.

There were a few dishes in the sink when he came, and the girl’s room was a tad untidy (papers they were coloring along with stuffed animals).

He took pictures then said that he felt had it not been for the maid service we had hired twice a month, I probably would have been over my head and that things were accumilating. I can only sit there and stare at him like he’s nuts.

I explained there is an ebb and flow of things in a home of 7 people, but that overall things get taken care of and are sanitary. He said that he would have to report the conditions of the home ‘inconclusive’ as whether or not the home would be a safe place for my children to be, and told me they would be making another visit soon.

It just makes you feel raped over and over. I feel like Im being harassed by the mafia only it’s a government agency. Ive been working myself to the bone now to the point of anxiety and I havent been able to kick this virus Im fighting. The stress feels overwhelming at times as do the nightmares. When is it going to end.

Were desperately looking for a new home and Ive been packing and purging things, only to have panic attacks that they are going to come in the middle of packing. I randomly sit in the middle of the floor and cry at times over the minor things they have power to take your kids over. There is no rest and it creates a huge stress on your marriage and your relationship with your kids. You turn into a slave driver, following the kids around forcing them to pick up everything, not allowing them to play with pens or crayons or clay or take things down to play with. I’m a prisoner in my home home.

[…] the downstairs recently. I’m due in 5 weeks so it’s getting down to the wire. We havent heard from CPS since June, where they said that their case was inconclusive whether or not our home was a detriment to the […]

26 Jun 2010, 9:59am
by eddie franklin


I feel and hurt deeply inside for you and your husband.The only way to fight these IDIOTS is to put them all on the defensive, and the only way is to go public with this. I know that there is a confidentiality law which is a misdemeanor. They have already broken it by discussing you with friends and family which we all know they do or how else would the courts know before anyone is or is ever charged with anything,May God bless you and yours, maybe a good christian person will pray for the cps workers to become honest.

 

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