Our Worst Nightmare

It has taken me some times to update this blog because the Sate of Nevada has single handedly decimated my family and that was not something I could write about easily. They think they have won but I have yet to begin to fight. My family is gone.  I am all that is left.  On April 9 2008 I was a happy loving doting mother of 2 beautiful girls and a proud military wife. Now as I sit here today I am neither a wife nor a mother. God took one of my girls but the state of Nevada took my other. When she needed her mommy the most, after her baby sister died, the ripped her away didnt even let us say goodbye and sent her to be with strangers. They say it was to protect her. Why? Because my house was messy! The only thing my daughter was in danger of was being loved too much and since there is no such thing as too much love I’d say she was in no danger at all. This has rocked me to my very core  and left me forever changed.  My marriage was never particularly strong, we had many problems but this was too much for it.  We are now divorcing.  So now I am all that is left.  They lied and twisted facts and played dirty and got my rights terminated and denied me contact to my daughter. Not only that but they have informed her that “mommy and daddy did bad things and so for your safety you can’t see them anymore”. We are appealing our case.  Now my daughter has been told it isnt safe to be with mom and dad. What if we win our appeal? What is that going to do to her mental  state? How can that be good for her?  But to them that is ok.  It is ok because THEY  arent the ones that have to look at her tear stained face every time she passes mommy and daddys house and tell her “no  we cannot stop by”  THEY  are not the ones that have to explain to her why when mommy calls her grandma to check on her that mommy isn’t allowed to talk to her.  They are not the ones who have to tell her through her sobs  “no sweetheart mommy and daddy CAN’T  come to your birthday party”  No, they let her grandma so that.  THAT isn’t their job description. They wouldn’t even allow me and her father one last visit to give her a hug and tell her that we DO love her very very much. DCFS thinks it has won. But I a not going to take it laying down.  Not only am I appealing my case to the supreme court and hope to expose them for the lying snakes they are but I have gone back to college.  I am now a SOCIAL WORK  major. I am going to start a foundation to combat these tyrants and to HELP families in crisis. Not threaten them or hurt them HELP them. Which forgive me if I’m wrong but isnt that SUPPOSED to be THIER job? Bt they wold rather resort to force and trickery so I will step up and be a help to families who need it. And there is nothing that DCFS can do about it.

In August we went for our Termination of Parental Rights trial. The matter is pending appeal so I will not go into detail just yet. However suffice it to say that the sate played dirty and twisted the fact and we had our rights terminated. Not only that but even though the judge recognized the strong bond between my daughter and I and her father too and issued nothing limiting our contact with her DCFS has since said that we are to have no contact with her what so ever. HOW IS THAT IN HER BEST INTERESTS mommy and daddy are there twice a week without fail and now suddenly POOF nothing. how can the state claim to care about what is best for Jessy and make such a restriction?

After we moved to Elko, as I previously mentioned in one of my other blogs, our case worker in Vegas imposed a visitation schedule. 3 hours a week. We moved from our home to be near our daughter for 3 hours a week! It is worth it to spend ANY time with our daughter but it just isnt enough.

Ever since I have been trying to get or visits increased and I always ALWAYS get the  run around.  The first time I approached the topic with my case worker she said ” Well……I’d like to see you finish your parenting classes and then we will talk.” SO WE DID! and then our worker said “Well………..I’d like to see you get into counseling and then we’ll talk.” SO WE DID! Then it was “Well…….I need a progress report from your counselor and then we’ll talk” So I called him and had him giver her one. NOW we have ANOTHER situation at hand.  I called my case worker and again asked for increased visitation and she said ” well there are some problems with that…..”

Apparently while at day care my daughter started crying and said ” I want my mommy but I hate her!” and now DCFS is making this HUGE deal about it. They want her to go see a child psychologist and make sure that contact with my husband and I isn’t “traumatizing” her. They refuse to increase our visitation with her until then. FOR CRYIN OUT LOUD!!!!!!! My daughter is THREE!!!!!! HATE is not a word she understands!! They automatically jump to the worst case scenario and assume that our being with her isnt HEALTHY for her??? COULD IT BE THAT SHE WANTED TO BE WITH ME AND WAS MAD BECAUSE SHE CANT BE?!?!? A three year old isn’t supposed to have such serious dilemmas so it is natural that she can’t find the right words to use to express her feelings. They are holding my daughter hostage and then cant understand why she is exhibiting signs of distress?? Have they considered that her “acting out” as they call it is the result of THEM ripping her away from us rather than US being BAD for her? No. I’m sure they haven’t.

So now our contact with our daughter hinges on what some psychologist has to say. A psychologist that we have no control over choosing ( they chose for us) , whom we dont even get to meet ( so that the Dr only has ONE side of the story) and whose report we will not see ( so DCFS can tell us anything they want!)   We have done EVERYTHING asked of us, jumped through all of the required hoops to increase our visitation and still they refuse to let us have any QUALTIY time with our child!  Forget unjust, this is flat out LUDACRIS!