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My Child Lives in Fear!

July 24, 2009 in parental rights, Tennessee

My name is Ashley H. and I have a son named Gary. Gary lives with his mom (Miranda) and step-father Chad and brother Joey in Kingsport, Tennessee.

Gary and his brother Joey fight constantly and don’t get along to the point that Gary stays with his grandmother and Joey stays at home until Miranda gets off of work. They are constantly picking on each other and in a constant battle for acceptance.

I am writing to anyone who will listen and help Gary. Gary lives in fear of Chad and has been physically abused. Chad has left a 16 to 18 inch bruise on Gary’s buttocks in the shape of a belt. Miranda’s family begged me not to press charges and in return they would make sure Chad would never physically disciplines Gary ever again. I made a mistake and complied with their demands.

My Child Lives in Fear!

About 6-months ago, Chad spanked Gary again, Gary called me from his cell phone and I called the police and headed to their house. When I arrived there, Chad was there but Miranda had taken the boys to her grandmothers. The officer looked at the red mark on Gary’s leg and said it looked like a normal spanking mark. That broke the agreement between Miranda’s family and I. When Gary called me, Chad immediately took his cell phone and threw it down the steps — just for calling his dad!

Gary came the following weekend for his visit and was scared to go home! So instead of calling the police I called his mother and told her the situation and she did the one thing I thought she would never do and that was manipulate Gary to get him to come home. The phone was on speaker phone and Gary was crying and pleading with his mother and telling her he was scared to go home and then she did the unthinkable.

She said “Gary, I am going to tell you something and you better not repeat this, but you are the favorite in this house, don’t you see how Chad treats you and how he treats Joey?” Naturally Gary went home thinking he had beaten Joey and that he was the favorite child.

That is very disturbing to me because:

  • How can you favor one child over the other in a normal home?
  • How could you say that to a scared child just to get him home?

The police officer even told me that after the first time (meaning the big bruise) that he would never let the guy touch his kids again.

In Tennessee DCS meeting they saw nothing wrong with Chad’s behavior.

Chad has turned the breaker off in Gary’s room, for punishment and forced him to sit in the dark with no electricity!

The most recent incident was a month ago. Gary was told to go to bed and he went in his brothers room to ask a question and Chad grabbed Gary by the neck and drug him into his room. The next morning Gary told me his neck was sore and the pain stayed for several days.

Gary is an ADHD child, his mother keeps him drugged up all the time and he is in therapy. I was attending his therapy sessions just as his therapist suggested. The therapist thinks Gary’s biggest conflict is that Miranda and I do not get along and that is not my fault, she won’t let go of the past. Chad put a stop to me going to his therapy sessions saying, “not on my dime!” Miranda is not raising a child, she is raising a drug addict. They give him an upper in the morning and a downer in the afternoon and downer at night.

I put Gary into Mixed Martial Arts to learn discipline and self control because I have done extensive research into MMA and it has been found to be a terrific teaching tool. In many cases the medications have been discontinued after this kind of training!

I gave Gary a pen and piece of paper and told him to write down the truth about his home life. Here is his words exactly:

WHEN CHAD GETS MAD

he kicks me

grabbed my head woke up neck hurting

throwing phone then lying

4 whipped me with a beltmade big bruise

Chad has a temper

I am scared when he does

Scared to talk back to my mom

(I asked him what he meant by that because I told him he wasn’t suppose to talk back to his mom and Gary said, “No, if I want to see you and mom won’t let me I am scared to say anything to her because I don’t know what Chad would do to me.”)

Chad leaves welts and bruises on me

The last time he whipped me I was scared to go home until they told me I was the favorite

Mad mom won’t let me see dad

When I was 3 he (Chad) threw me and almost hit my head on the bunk bed

Temper scares me because I don’t have a choice to stay there because of mom

Gary

That was the front page and now the back page:

I feel like my own mom doesn’t love me because I want them to work it out but she doesn’t want to she would rather go to jail.

(He was talking then about his mother and I having a civil relationship. Chad would never let that happen because he is too overbearing and jealous.)

The sad part is, they split up Christmas before last and she told me she was scared of Chad’s temper. The only reason she went back to him was because of their debt. She is an accountant for a Credit Union and would lose her job if they default on a loan or file for bankruptcy!

I have petitioned the court for joint custody and we go to court Monday, July 27th. I have worked with CASA, which is the local child advocate in our area and they have been wonderful. They did tell me “mental abuse” is almost never proven! I think there is enough physical abuse to warrant Chad never applying physical discipline with Gary again, even though CASA told me “mental abuse” is almost never proven I know it’s taking place.

I am going to send this to anyone who will listen and I am looking for any agency or child advocate that will help me. If you know about any agency local, state or federal that can help me please let me know who they are and/or pass this on to them!

I am sick of my child living in fear but I am trying to keep a cool calm head and get this resolved in the right way, so please help me if at all possible!

Sincerely,

Gary has a dream —and that dream is to fulfill his dreams and show other people they can achieve their own dreams. Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something and overcome obstacles! That is Gary’s message and I am going to do anything to see his work and message and dream is fulfilled!

I am enclosing Gary’s original message!

Where is the Church?

January 29, 2009 in Adoption, California, parental rights

A Father’s untold story; What’s behind Parental Alienation

January 28, 2009

Hi Ms. Jayne Major,

We met about a year & a half ago at your regular Denny’s restaurant meeting. I was in town after delivering an Airstream RV unit in Long Beach. It was great to hear some of your people tell their stories. Thank you for having Breakthrough Parenting Services and trying to stop parental alienation of children living in Los Angeles, Calif.

I’m caught up in my extended family abuse of my relationship with my son and the court enforcement of it. Some kind of intervention is needed. Maybe you can give me direction? From my end of it they have been hell bent on alienating me from my son and tight lipped.

The main opposition is coming from one of my younger brothers and his wife who are United Methodist. My brother is a pastor of a small church in Andover, Ohio. The court placed my 8-year-old son with my brother and his wife in 2000, after a temporary dependency incident that lasted only a few days and instead of resolving any concerns my brother or the court had in honesty and truth, they turned it into an excuse to never return my son.

They have used my mistakes as an excuse to terminate our father and son relationship. I know my brother is hostile towards me, and refuses to resolve the matter in adherence to the Christian instruction he is in the pulpit to preach.

For the court it’s about the huge amounts of money their making by dragging cases out and misappropriating the funds that are originally intended to help struggling families. All Bar Association affiliated attorneys have their hands tied and cannot get the job done right, even if they wanted to.

I’m self-described as a Born Again Christian and basically there is no meaningful assistance from the majority of the churches because they have registered and incorporated themselves with secular government, for the so-called benefits of limited liability and operate under a corporate charter, rather than simply follow and doing what the Holy Bible instructs.

Essentially, they have divorced themselves from their head, Jesus Christ, and do not realize they are being deceived — or if they do — and many of the pastors do, but not so much the congregations. They don’t care because they like the materialistic humanistic way of life and if the congregation doesn’t hold them accountable for their lack of properly spiritual leading, they will continue to deceive.

This is the reason why my pastor brother and his wife, et al, have been so calloused towards me falsely testifying against me in court resulting in the separation and alienation of my son and me from each other.

In order to be a true believer in God you have to stand for truth. The truth is to those who hate the truth; hate and they react in viciousness. Because they see that their fraudulent less than honest ways of making a living is threatened by the living witness of those who sincerely want to retain the freedom to live their lives, based upon the values that made us great to begin with. We govern ourselves according to the highest law, that of our creator, and not to have that value standard perverted and lied about, as if its some kind of crime to honor and respect your heavenly Father’s commandments.

I believe the anti-Christ government, police state, mentality that is rearing its ugly head is the number one terrorist and is being advanced by evil people in high positions to use fear and trauma to break the masses of people down in order to relinquish rights and be subjected to the socialist plundering of America.

If you have any helpful comments they will be appreciated. I am not highly educated but I am reaching out because I was given the gift of my son — to be my son’s father — and that comes with a sacred duty and responsibility that I was performing and wish to resume and continue to perform without unjust interference.

My son is 17 now and knows what happened and it’s strange to me that he ignores me by not doing anything to stay in contact. On rare events when I do see him off the record he acts very respectful and we have had pleasant times together, sharing, etc.

I want my son to have the best future he can and I know that God placed me here because as a his earthly father I am the only one along with his mother that has his highest best interest in mind, not the state.

I have come to a conclusion, that is, I have a relationship with my Father that I won’t let go. I also have a need to get closure concerning this crime brought against me, and my son. Before I can even think about getting on with the rest of my life, this corrupt custody case of abuse of the public trust has to be resolved.

Thank you for reading my story.
Richard Palo
General post-office
Conneaut, Ohio 44030
216-926-5003 cell

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