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Foster Child Speaks Out

March 31, 2014 in Child Protective Services, corruption, foster care

help3_ezrI’m a former foster child. I had suffered abuse at home with my step dad. I stood up to my abuser and asked for the help of child protective services. He confessed and was convicted for his crime and I was placed in foster care. Even though my step dad was the criminal he was released years before I was. Foster care had become such an abusive prison for me I finally ran away, homeless out on the streets, to young to work and no where to go.

Not only do I have physical scars from the abuse I received in foster care but some days I still cry from the type of mental maltreatment I received at the hands of my supposed protectors. I’d come a long way since foster care. I had worked full time and went to school at night to finish high school and continue further in my education to become a surgical dental assistant. Later, I changed my career path and began working for scholastic books. I refused to allow CPS, my therapist, and the foster parents opinions to control who I would become or to limit my future. (I was lucky to be stubborn and rebellious.)

Here recently I’ve had a great opportunity to become connected with other former foster children, and we each share our stories with each other and give each other support. But I started to notice something. The opinions and ordeals each former foster child had faced in foster care, seemed to echo the same opinion or same unacceptable situation when thrown into foster care. For example:

An ex foster child said something recently that had caught my attention. She said, “One thing that bothers me is society says parents who use drugs, abuse their kids, neglects them, and many more things, aren’t good enough to be parents and forcefully removes the children. This very same society looks the other way when we’re abused in foster care, moved several times, remain in limbo for years without any stability.

Kids in jail

We go years if not forever, waiting to be adopted by these people, but they go overseas to adopt. We get dumped out on the street and left to survive like animals when we age out of the system with absolutely nothing. Society doesn’t care what happens after we leave our unfit parents. When in some cases the unfit parents are 100% better than the numerous foster homes who have been checked out by the state and approved. Just because we leave our unfit parents doesn’t mean we live happily ever after.”

Here are some numbers found on Wikipedia that support this former foster child’s statement.

Maltreatment per 100,000 US children.

CPS    Parents

Physical Abuse           160          59
Sexual Abuse              112          13
Neglect                          410       241
Medical Neglect             14          12
Fatalities                           6.4        1.5

I’ve also had an ex foster child contact me wondering why foster kids are treated so badly and no one pays attention. His reasoning, his temporary foster parent had run him over with her truck. He was pronounced dead but then had finally been revived. He sued the state for this and somehow only ended up with $40 thousand dollars and mass long term pain (his court appointed lawyer received the bulk of the money) and he also has many bills from the doctors, him and his bio mother are obligated to pay. ( I can understand his frustrations.)

I’ve been reading many ex foster kids stories (including having my own) and what I find is more atrocities after they were removed then what they experience at home. I can not help but wonder why this agency has made such great leaps and bounds on how to manipulate, maneuver through the law, and perfect how to remove children but they themselves have no idea how to raise children. They have spent millions upon million each year for over 30 or 40 years on these state run agencies yet in general all they have produced is abused and neglected children who go on to struggle in society.

Look at these statistics copied from children’s rights.org

  • 12-30 percent struggled with homelessness
  • 40-63 percent did not complete high school
  • 25-55 percent were unemployed; those employed had average earnings below the poverty level, and only 38 percent of those employed were still working after one year
  • 30-62 percent had trouble accessing health care due to inadequate finances or lack of insurance
  • 32-40 percent were forced to rely on some form of public assistance and 50 percent experienced extreme financial hardship
  • 31-42 percent had been arrested
  • 18-26 percent were incarcerated
  • 40-60 percent of the young women were pregnant within 12-18 months of leaving foster care.

Nancy Schaefer already further summarized all of this as, “The National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect in 1998 reported that six times as many children died in foster care than in the general public and that once removed to official “safety”, these children are far more likely to suffer abuse, including sexual molestation, than in the general population. Think what that number is today ten years later!”

Senator Nancy Schaefer reported, “that poor parents very often are targeted to lose their children because they do not have the where-with-all to hire lawyers and fight the system. Being poor does not mean you are not a good parent or that you do not love your child, or that your child should be removed and placed with strangers; that all parents are capable of making mistakes and that making a mistake does not mean your children are to be removed from the home. Even if the home is not perfect, it is home; and that’s where a child is the safest and where he or she wants to be, with family;

I’ve also read countless ex foster children’s stories of how they had been medicated for one thing after another and even witnessed an adopted child so overly medicated, he could not control himself. Thankfully after talking to his adoptive parents they agreed to slowly back him off of the 10 medications he was on. (He spent a lot of time in my home during this time) he has calmed down greatly and has now been able to focus and excel in school.

Some ex foster kids talk about the long term effects these medications have caused them, long after they have finally gotten off of the drugs. Some must continue taking different types of meds to help them deal with the after effects of the medications forced upon them in foster care, (all under the guise of being in their best interest).

Here’s one former foster child’s statement of what she had been through and how the medications affected her.

“I was living in Maryville, Tennessee and was 14 years old. I was depressed but I was a really quiet kid and a laid back type. These folks decided to start me on meds for my depression (a little red pill that I don’t know what it was) shortly after, I noticed I was feeling anxious and nervous. Then I noticed that I started having a short fuse when it came to my temper and it was more difficult to calm down. I told the group home owner this, but she wouldn’t have me taken off the meds.

I started spitting the meds into a paper Dixie cup they would give me water in to take my medications and crush the cup so no one saw. I started to feel normal again, I did that for a month before I was ratted out by another kid. Any way they took me to a doctor that put me on Paxil. The night they gave me that stuff, I was wired for sound and tried to play sumo wrestling with my roommate Donelle. The medication made me constipated and I felt overly psycho, again, no one would listen to me asking to be taken off the meds.

I also noticed I had more issues than usual on concentrating on my school work and I started being mean to others, really mean, as in hitting folks and yelling, it was like I was losing control. I found myself withdrawing because of it and crying my eyes out at every turn. That’s the same year I started having panic episodes. One day decided to ditch school and just go walking… I was told that I cussed out all of the group home staff but I do not remember it… Eric blankenship could tell you a lot about that. I was picked up by the police and taken back to the group home but then I was moved to a teen psych ward.

There at the psych ward they gave me a higher dose of Paxil and added Milloril to my meds and some pill they were telling me was a vitamin but I’m sure it was a tranquilizer because not long after taking it, I could barely hold my head up.

This went on for a month solid until a caseworker (a man) showed up to take me to my next placement. I was on those meds from foster home to foster home then one day I was taken to an all girl group home in Knoxville, Tennessee where shortly after I was abruptly changed from the Paxil and Millorill, to Prozac and Trazedone. The first time they gave me the Prozac, I was 15 years old and was being given 3 Prozac a day and my head always felt like I had a chunk of lead tied to it. Schooling was hard because it was a new place and I felt crazy out of my head. I hated everyone and everything.

I felt as if my mind was working overtime and I was suicidal because i could not calm down and in that same place I was fondled by one of the men staff workers when we went on a trip to the University of Tennessee Race Track. I would scream in the night in my sleep and I would be so nervous every day. I got defiant with the staff and would cuss this one lady in particular named Deiadra. She was a reasonably nice person but I got to where nothing mattered.

Till this very day, I am a nervous type person and I still have the panic episodes that started as a teenager, I have a very hard time coming down from any emotion whether it be anger, anxiety, joy, depression, fear, etc. I know it was because of the meds because prior to the meds, I was able to keep my emotions in check. I’m angry that this has to be this way, with me but this crap has forever changed me, along with all the being passed around like a dooby. It, all has an effect on me that, will never be normal again. I still consider myself a glitch ”

For more Facts About Aging Out visit: Children’s Rights.

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Nevada: Wealthy Grandparents

December 22, 2013 in CPS, family court, Nevada

My grandson was Kidjacked!

The paternal grandparents are super wealthy and are most likely paying people off to get this baby to stay with them. Devastating to my daughter and myself maternal grandmother. He didn’t need CPS, but somehow it went from family court to me as safety for one week, then CPS and next thing they have him in their home.

Long story. Would love to share.

Makes no sense to me that they don’t have time for the kids that need intervention, while they are busy working this case and coming up with false accusations. I was the grandmother that watched him all the time on weekends, while my daughter worked and now I don’t get to see him for months.

The wealthy grandparents had no interest in him until their son lost temporary custody in family court. He has two other boys he can’t visit w/o supervision and doesn’t bother, but judge Porter gave him temporary custody until he got a DUI. He even failed drug test, same judges courtroom in 2012.

Meanwhile my daughter was on rx and marijuana card for migraines. Now she’s not getting visits and says ” she’s lost her soul.”  I can’t have him because of accusations of myself and daughter “dynamics.”  Nobody had even been around us but guardian ad litem.

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Nevada DFS: LIES

December 22, 2013 in Child Protective Services, corruption, Nevada

My child was kidnapped by my ex-husband while he was being investigated for sexually abusing our toddler. The police said that the doctors opinions that the child had been assaulted wasn’t enough to make an arrest, they needed his DNA inside her, or a video of him committing the act.

CPS was called by the doctors, and the state of Nevada’s own state child therapist diagnosed my baby with PTSD, from a sexual assault that the therapist believed occurred at the hands of her father. The CPS caseworker said she had no case, and to stop wasting her time, she turned the investigation on me, then made a “substantiated findings of abuse and neglect” on ME, just from statements made by my ex husband.

I went all the way to the “Fair Hearing” and proved the caseworker had lied and neglected to do her job. They were COURT ORDERED to remove me from the “Child Abuse Registry.” DFS, and every other government agency says they can’t force CPS to do anything, despite the court order being ignored.

Now in retaliation they have recommended sole physical custody to my ex, and continue to harass me. I haven’t broken the law, or ever abused any of my children, (two are grown, one is younger and living in Texas with her God parents while I fight for my now five year old in Nevada).   They think they are above reproach, no matter what proof I have, or what a Hearing Master Ordered in a court order. They are ruining my life, and have kept my baby and I from spending one minute alone in three years. I’m exhausted, and emotionally spent. Can you offer any advice?

Sincerely,
Victoria Reynolds

The CPS caseworker Nicole Miller avoided needing a Judge to sign off on this and give me what’s known as a “family plan” (a parents chance to jump through hoops for the state, to reconnect with the child) by not having any reason to arrest me. So as I am not a criminal, I have still been given no attorney. Where as a rapist or murderer would be given an attorney by law if they could not afford one, but NOT a single mother working her way through school, neither arrested nor convicted of anything.

Can this REALLY happen?

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NV: Adoption Gone Wrong!

July 1, 2013 in Adoption, Child Protective Services, corruption, foster parents, Nevada

I received this email a couple days ago.  I think it’s great that the great uncle came forward.  I believe children should be kept in the family if at all possible.  But I’ve included her contact information, if anyone cares to contact her.

My uncle Sieb as a child in a tub in the garde...

My uncle Sieb as a child in a tub in the garden. Notice the dog in front of him. It’s 1931.

We were interested in adopting three siblings in Clark County. We went to the case worker Seidy White. She told us to meet them and make sure we were a good fit. Which we did – on several occasions.

My second visit with Seidy I received the news that she was working with a great uncle whom she wanted to adopt the children. She still allowed us visits with the children.

I am upset because I feel there has been foul play within the department because:

  • They did not allow us to go before the judge or be heard in CFT meetings.
  • When there are more parties who are interested in the children, the judge deserves to hear what the entire story and ALL the options are. Not just what they (Seidy White and Damalia Guiterrez) want.
  • They did not allow the judge to hear all accurate facts (regarding the great uncle – who is getting them in spite of his total lack of involvement their entire lives and more). They also didn’t listen to the facts that due to the children being in foster care for more than 12 months it negated the family claim of being best choice automatically – they were in foster care for 16 months with no interest from the uncle during that time. A disinterested party who cares more about when he can claim them on his tax return and tax deductions is getting them. This cannot be right!

They KNEW the uncle had not initiated one visit with the children while they were in foster care – not even when they said they would take them. Who would do this? Who in their right mind wouldn’t be trying to get to know them to make transition easier? This is NOT right.

He has had no interaction with them except twice – once initiated by Seidy – the other by the foster mom. It was for a short time both visits. They were surprised he did NOT make an effort – but it didn’t sway their opinion of them wanting him to have them.

  • They have lied to the birth mom, the foster mom and me (since they told us all conflicting stories). They clearly had two parties interested and on equal footing since the time the children were in foster care negated the family claim on them.
  • Due to the [amount] of time that the children were in foster care, the great uncle was not automatically the “best fit” as stated.
  • CPS was surprised that he didn’t initiate visits even after he said he would take them – but they are giving them to him anyway.
  • They did not allow my lawyer an opportunity to speak.
  • They coerced the birth mom into things she didn’t want.
  • They promised her help which they did not give.
  • They promised her things that they know outright the uncle has no intention of doing.

It appears that they have done what they deemed to be best interest because it’s what they wanted – not what was truly in the best interest of the children.

To have those children with their foster mom for that long (more than 16 months – which for the baby is half of his life), finally have stability and not have them remain able to see her again is like cruel punishment to the children. Any person who spent any amount of time with the  children would see that they love her and feel secure around her. To yank them away and give them to total strangers is indeed cruel in my opinion.

We would have had the foster mom be “grandma” and kept the birth mom in the picture so she could heal and the children would have access to their identity of who they are and where they came from…

Had they allowed us to be heard by the judge and he ruled that it was in the best interest of the children to go with the uncle that would have been one thing- but they didn’t.

Why am I doing this?

  • Because I know these children. I love them, they are bonded to their foster mom and should have her as part of their lives. She would adopt them but feels she is too old.
  • And… because they didn’t let the judge hear the facts and decide what was best.
  • They also ignored the knowledge that a state psychologist said the scenario of us having them with the foster mom as grandma with us as adoptive parent was the absolute best scenario.

I don’t believe the uncle wants them for more than a tax write off and the money you will give him. His lack of interaction speaks significantly louder than his words.

I don’t know where to go – but there has to be someone who actually cares that there is corruption in DES CPS and that the judges are ruling on cases they don’t have the facts for – intentionally left out by the case worker and her supervisor.

Nancy Genys
ngenys@gmail.com
480-390-5790

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Catch More Flies

January 1, 2013 in CPS, DFS, family court

A determined young lady has written dozens of e-mails over the past couple of weeks – many of them were simply horrendous (sorry girl). This letter was written in response to one of them.

Dear Friend,

I have provided links, advice and legal resources on Kidjacked. My phone and e-mail are being blown up with requests for help and questions galore. I am sorry but I do this in my spare time and frankly I don’t have much of that.

I maintain over 200 websites (both ours and our clients websites) — my husband and I work from home. The only money I make from Kidjacked comes from the ads that are found on each page (and we only get paid when someone actually clicks on an ad – DO NOT click ads to make us money, though, only ever click the ads you’re actually interested in).

Where are all the kids?

Where are all the kids?

I wish that I could do this full-time and be there to walk everyone through the steps they need to take to fight their cases, but the fact is I simply don’t have that kind of time and most people can’t afford to pay me for it. I have never asked anyone for a dime for myself or my family — and we are not wealthy. Heck, we drive a 1999 vehicle that we will drive until the tires fall off.

I will offer you my best advice:

  • When e-mailing your lawyer, your caseworker and others, it is crucial that you avoid threatening them in any way, no matter how badly you want to serve them their head on a platter.
  • Each and every letter or e-mail should be checked for spelling, grammar and content. (Put your best face forward.) This information can and often is presented in court and can be used against you.
  • Grandma always said you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. Your letters and telephone calls need to be eloquent, yet firm. There is always a way to get your point across without being crude and insulting. Practice until you get it right!
  • Enlist your friends and relatives to help with your research. Have someone else read your letters before you send them off and edit them if necessary. Censor yourself. Seek the council of others who have fought the system and won their case. Don Lyons fought and was able to get his children returned. He wrote a book about it. Purchase or borrow books like his. [Get the book now: Kids For Money]
  • Form local support groups [Use the box under the calendar to select your state, then scroll to the bottom of the page.]
  • Picket your local court. Hand out pamphlets; they are easy to create. Be sure to include the URL to Kidjacked.com. Spread the word and join with others.
  • Request letters of recommendation from friends, family, professionals (doctors, pastors, co-workers) who know you and your family; present them in court. Make copies for your attorney and caseworkers.
  • Know the laws in your state. Become an expert in CPS guidelines and regulations. File an official complaint when those laws and guidelines are violated. Each State or County has their own regulations they are required to follow. The only way to force an investigation is to file an official complaint. Often the complaint procedure is available online, if not you must request the information directly from CPS — they are required by law to provide it to you.
  • Most county agencies have an “ombudsman” you can contact to assist you. Some are helpful and other are not. It’s worth a shot to try.
  • If you discover CPS agents are not in compliance with the laws in your state (or county), you can contact your congressman. The U.S. House of Representatives is responsible for oversight of the Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS). Visit the website, locate your representative by using the list or search functions on the site. Call their office, ask to speak to the aide who handles DHHS issues. Briefly explain your situation and the violations that have occurred. Do not go into your entire case history.The aide will request you fax or mail your supporting documentation and a release form, which allows the aide to investigate your allegations. Requesting an investigation is often enough to force CPS to clean up their act because they will receive notification that they are under investigation along with the allegations made against them.
  • You’ve heard it said the squeaky wheel gets the grease. It’s true. Be polite and be firm, but don’t stop. If you can turn up the heat on CPS workers, they will often dismiss their case against you out of pure frustration and fear. You must make it more costly to keep your children in custody or harass you than it is for them to send them home and leave you alone. This means keeping on the pressure.

I have spent over an hour writing this e-mail. I will be posting it on “Jacked Up,” the Kidjacked blog in hopes that this information will be helpful to others.

I wish you well in handling your case. Please send me an occasional update (written “ready to post”) and I will be happy to post the information to Kidjacked, in hopes that the information will provide encouragement and details that will assist other parents in gaining the return of their children. None of us can do it all alone but if we each pitch in and do our part, we can make a difference.

This is my small part.

Best wishes!

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