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No Fault CPS! WTF?

December 23, 2013 in CPS, foster parents, investigation, Kidjacked

In 2012, my family turned  my  baby  over  to  CPS when I was  forced to go in  for treatment. Upon  my release,  two weeks later they had no choice but to return her because (& I quote) “it  was  due  to  no  fault  of your own, that she was taken from your care. “

I was kept an eye on for about six months, when I receive a letter stating that if I try to adopt or decide to become a foster parent I could not, because I had a child endangerment charge against me. I am wondering if that is because I complained about my baby coming back to me different.

I let them know the concerns I had with the home they put my daughter in. She told me that the woman had children of her own. Her son would hold my daughter down, by stomping on her with his feet. If my daughter dared to cry, the woman encouraged her son and daughter to punch my daughter in the stomach, call her names or slap her in the face.

The children then told my daughter if she told, no one would believe her because she was just a stupid foster kid.

My daughter is only five years old and this woman’s children were much older.  My baby also had a gold necklace, with a gold crucifix that the woman took from my daughter, and gave to her own.

When I contacted the worker to report this conduct I was just passed off with a question on what I was doing to ensure the welfare of my child.  As far as I know to this day nothing has been done.

Today, my child is in treatment herself and wakes up during the night crying because she is so afraid this woman and her children will find her and hurt her again. I spend quite sometime calming my baby down assuring her that she is home safe and sound and mommy would NEVER let anyone or anything hurt her ever again.

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NV: Adoption Gone Wrong!

July 1, 2013 in Adoption, Child Protective Services, corruption, foster parents, Nevada

I received this email a couple days ago.  I think it’s great that the great uncle came forward.  I believe children should be kept in the family if at all possible.  But I’ve included her contact information, if anyone cares to contact her.

My uncle Sieb as a child in a tub in the garde...

My uncle Sieb as a child in a tub in the garden. Notice the dog in front of him. It’s 1931.

We were interested in adopting three siblings in Clark County. We went to the case worker Seidy White. She told us to meet them and make sure we were a good fit. Which we did – on several occasions.

My second visit with Seidy I received the news that she was working with a great uncle whom she wanted to adopt the children. She still allowed us visits with the children.

I am upset because I feel there has been foul play within the department because:

  • They did not allow us to go before the judge or be heard in CFT meetings.
  • When there are more parties who are interested in the children, the judge deserves to hear what the entire story and ALL the options are. Not just what they (Seidy White and Damalia Guiterrez) want.
  • They did not allow the judge to hear all accurate facts (regarding the great uncle – who is getting them in spite of his total lack of involvement their entire lives and more). They also didn’t listen to the facts that due to the children being in foster care for more than 12 months it negated the family claim of being best choice automatically – they were in foster care for 16 months with no interest from the uncle during that time. A disinterested party who cares more about when he can claim them on his tax return and tax deductions is getting them. This cannot be right!

They KNEW the uncle had not initiated one visit with the children while they were in foster care – not even when they said they would take them. Who would do this? Who in their right mind wouldn’t be trying to get to know them to make transition easier? This is NOT right.

He has had no interaction with them except twice – once initiated by Seidy – the other by the foster mom. It was for a short time both visits. They were surprised he did NOT make an effort – but it didn’t sway their opinion of them wanting him to have them.

  • They have lied to the birth mom, the foster mom and me (since they told us all conflicting stories). They clearly had two parties interested and on equal footing since the time the children were in foster care negated the family claim on them.
  • Due to the [amount] of time that the children were in foster care, the great uncle was not automatically the “best fit” as stated.
  • CPS was surprised that he didn’t initiate visits even after he said he would take them – but they are giving them to him anyway.
  • They did not allow my lawyer an opportunity to speak.
  • They coerced the birth mom into things she didn’t want.
  • They promised her help which they did not give.
  • They promised her things that they know outright the uncle has no intention of doing.

It appears that they have done what they deemed to be best interest because it’s what they wanted – not what was truly in the best interest of the children.

To have those children with their foster mom for that long (more than 16 months – which for the baby is half of his life), finally have stability and not have them remain able to see her again is like cruel punishment to the children. Any person who spent any amount of time with the  children would see that they love her and feel secure around her. To yank them away and give them to total strangers is indeed cruel in my opinion.

We would have had the foster mom be “grandma” and kept the birth mom in the picture so she could heal and the children would have access to their identity of who they are and where they came from…

Had they allowed us to be heard by the judge and he ruled that it was in the best interest of the children to go with the uncle that would have been one thing- but they didn’t.

Why am I doing this?

  • Because I know these children. I love them, they are bonded to their foster mom and should have her as part of their lives. She would adopt them but feels she is too old.
  • And… because they didn’t let the judge hear the facts and decide what was best.
  • They also ignored the knowledge that a state psychologist said the scenario of us having them with the foster mom as grandma with us as adoptive parent was the absolute best scenario.

I don’t believe the uncle wants them for more than a tax write off and the money you will give him. His lack of interaction speaks significantly louder than his words.

I don’t know where to go – but there has to be someone who actually cares that there is corruption in DES CPS and that the judges are ruling on cases they don’t have the facts for – intentionally left out by the case worker and her supervisor.

Nancy Genys
ngenys@gmail.com
480-390-5790

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Parenting a Liar…

November 1, 2011 in foster care, foster parents, Kidjacked, parent-child relationship

Do you have a child who lies for no apparent reason? You aren’t alone and you could be a big part of the problem, which means you can help.

A woman typing on a laptop

Foster kids need computers too

Before you get all indignant, please understand, I believe some children have what I think of, as a “lying gene,” and lying simply comes natural to these children. Children who have been moved around from foster care home to foster care home, will often take on a new identity, when they realize they are living with complete strangers and can become anyone they wish. In these cases, lying becomes a way of life.

These foster children are the ones the system likes to label as RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder) children. Children in foster care soon learn to keep people at a distance and will have trust issues. Who can blame them? You can’t wear your heart on your sleeve without having it repeatedly broken by a heartless uncaring system, where the individual gets chewed up in the grinding of the system.

I can remember carrying everything I own in a paper bag. I’m certain many foster care children are thrilled to receive suitcases from churches, schools and other charitable organizations that have donation drives for foster kids. It would be wonderful if more could be done for these children. It’s too bad most foster care children never receive the benefits of things done in their name — such as donations for laptops.

Just how long do you think a child alone, left to the mercy of the system, will be able to keep a $1,000 laptop — or even a $250 notebook? If they aren’t stolen by a foster family member or foster parent, the temptation to sell it for cash or even drugs (if they are an issue) is great.

Getting back to the child with the imaginary “lying gene”

Learning how to better approach the child, can drastically increase his or her truth-telling. If you have one child, this is much easier, because you know who “did it,” you don’t have to play investigator. So, insteading of asking the child, “Who left the toilet seat up?” You simply say, “Please don’t leave the seat up on the toilet.”

As parents of a child with lying issues, it’s easy to get into the bad habit of asking questions that we already know the answers to. When we learn to rephrase our questions, or avoid asking a question all-together, we can help avoid the temptation to lie.  Often with a little thought and an attitude change, you can help your child feel better about his or herself and break the cycle of lying.

It is up to the parent to demonstrate good moral fortitude. Be sure your child hears you being honest. Take the time to continually express the importance on honestly. The Bible can serve as a useful tool in training your child in honesty. Ask your child to read, memorize, copy and recite from this list of scripture verses on honesty.

You can choose to tolerate your child’s lying, which can and often will continue as a pattern into adulthood or you can choose to change your parenting style and address the issue — the earlier the better. If you have a child who is constantly lying, don’t give up — get help.

 [Download: Bible Lesson on Truth and Lies (pdf)]

Click Here to Stop the Yelling • Lecturing • Scolding Pushing and Prodding
and Start Getting The Results You Want

Teaching Honesty to our Children

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Kinship care vs Fostering

October 15, 2011 in California, DCF, DCFS, DHS, family rights, foster parents, grandparents rights, Idaho, Michigan

I’ve had several people in the past few weeks tell me that they wish to care for their own family members – as opposed to having them placed in foster care, with strangers. These grandparents, aunts, uncles and other close relatives are being told they must become certified foster parents.

Advocating for Children in Foster and Kinship Care: A Guide to Getting the Best out of the System for Caregivers and Practitioners Federal law requires that state social workers attempt to find suitable placement for “at risk” children, who are removed from their home. In many cases the state is merely paying lip-service and doesn’t actually follow the law.

This is a violation of federal law and the state can lose their federal funding. You should always report such violations of federal law to your U.S. House Representation. Call and request an investigation. You will need to provide them with a legal release form, along with the facts and any supporting documents.

Just today the Idaho Press-Tribune ran an interesting article:

In Idaho, more grandparents still in parental role

Many grandparents who take in grandchildren qualify for a $300 Temporary Assistance for Needy Families grant. The amount is the same regardless of the number of children in a family.

Grandparents also can become certified as foster parents, and take in their own grandchildren through the state system. That means more financial support. Monthly foster payments per child in Idaho range from $274 to $431 based on age; payments increase if children have special needs. Foster children get Medicaid cards and other benefits.

But many families don’t want to do that, Perry said. Some bristle at the idea of giving the state that much control over their families, even temporarily.

“They feel taking care of their own family is their responsibility,” he said.

Tracee Crawford, one of the leaders of the Grandparents as Parents of the Treasure Valley, a Southwest Idaho support group, said grandparents sometimes hesitate to ask for help of any kind, afraid that if they make trouble, their children will take the grandchildren away.

Becoming a legal guardian, another option, comes with its own complications, including steep legal costs, said Crawford.

She became part of a kin-care family when her daughter had cancer. Crawford cared for her and her grandson until her daughter died. She’s been in long legal battles with her former son-in-law over visitation rights with her grandson.

“To become a legal guardian, you have to prove a parent — your child — is unfit,” she said. “That’s really hard to do” — factually and emotionally.

Each state is different, which makes it difficult to know exactly what the law is your own state.

In my own case, I was shocked to find that while I was getting monthly kinship care checks from the State of California of ($357 – back in 2002), at the same time, another relative had a sibling to my grandson. The only difference was that they lived in Michigan; her checks from the State of Michigan – $123.  I felt bad for her because this child has autism and even in Michigan $123. doesn’t go far.

Be sure you check into your own states law, make a few phone calls, talk to an attorney and check out a few state websites before you sign anything. The choice you make could make a big difference in just how much help you are entitled to.

On that note, let me just remind you that if you accept money from the state, you accept all the strings that go along with that money, but it’s better than starving — maybe. We didn’t like giving up so much of our privacy, so we stopped received state funds many years ago – as soon as we could stand on our own two feet.

Knowledge is Power! Exercise your brain.

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DCFS and Rett Syndrome

October 4, 2011 in Adoption, Arkansas, corruption, DCFS, foster care, foster parents

Who will stand up and speak out against the power hungry DCFS workers in Little Rock, Arkansas? Even children with Rett Syndrome deserve parents! Why would the state prefer to warehouse children in an institution? It doesn’t make any sense. Read Jill’s story…

My daughter’s foster home closed this past week, due to some paperwork she had not turned in. I am by no means excusing this, as she has acknowledged she was in the wrong.

Official seal of City of Little Rock, Arkansas

Little Rock DCFS, Out of Control!

She and her husband were in the process of adopting three girls. The attorney for the 14 year old requested a hearing; the judge gave custody to my daughter and son in law. The judge said he was displeased with how DCFS had handled the case.

They removed the 4 year old from their home on Thursday; and placed her in an institution, located in North Little Rock. She suffers from Rett Syndrome, a severe form of autism, and she is unable to speak. They removed the six year old on Friday morning, and placed her in another foster home.

My daughter was told she could not speak to, nor assist with the transition of the four year old. My daughter is the only one who has cared for this child in three and a half years. She has fought the state on numerous occasions to get the training needed to care for this child.

DCFS also failed the children. The 14 year old met with her caseworker once – six months ago – the day before a court hearing. The next day, in court, the caseworker did not know her name, age, or where she went to school. Caseworkers, by law, are required to visit children on a weekly basis — no one has been in the home to check on any of the children in six months.

When we were in court, the DCFS workers were sitting directly in front of us, they talked about my family, knowing we could hear every word they uttered. One made the comment that she had wanted to close this foster home since last November. However, they placed another child in the home just this past spring.

The agency has opposed the adoption of the four year old because of her disability. They say she is better off in an institution.

We love this little girl and do not feel she is a burden at all. My daughter and son in law asked to proceed with the adoption of the four and six year old. They even offered to waive any stipend the state would pay, but the state workers declined. Maybe it is the position of the state that all handicapped children should live in an institution?

I believe these children belong in a loving home with friends and family to call their own. What the state is doing is wrong.

Jill H.
Little Rock, Arkansas

Learn More About Rett Syndrome

WebMD Medical Reference

Rett syndrome is an autism spectrum disorder that affects girls almost exclusively. When boys develop the Rett syndrome mutation, they die shortly after birth.

What Are the Symptoms of Rett Syndrome?

Although it’s not always detected, a slowing of head growth is one of the first events in Rett syndrome. Loss of muscle tone is also an initial symptom. Soon, the little girl loses any purposeful use of her hands. Instead, she habitually wrings or rubs her hands together.

Around 1 to 4 years of age, social and language skills deteriorate in girls with Rett syndrome. A girl with Rett syndrome stops talking. She develops extreme social anxiety and withdrawal or disinterest in other people.

Rett syndrome also causes problems with muscles and coordination. Walking becomes awkward as girls develop a jerky, stiff-legged gait. A girl with Rett syndrome may also have uncoordinated breathing and seizures.

Treatments for Rett Syndrome

There are treatments available for Rett syndrome. Rett syndrome treatments focus on helping a girl live the best life she can with the condition. Physical therapy can help improve mobility in these children. Speech therapy may help somewhat with language problems. Occupational therapy helps girls perform daily activities — like bathing and dressing — independently.

Experts believe that therapy can help girls with Rett syndrome and their parents. Although a “normal” life may not be possible, some improvement can be expected with therapy. Participating in activities — including school — and improved social interaction are sometimes possible.

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